Ya know, it's funny....

The holidays are upon us and I'm so excited!

It's funny how when you have a child, the holidays become fun and exciting and new again. It's like experiencing your childhood all over again (which may or may not be a good thing for some people). At this point Avery is just too young to know of all the festivities going on around her, but, boy, it sure is fun to pretend that she is appreciating the good smells coming from the kitchen, the dozens of toys under the christmas tree for her, and all of the houses decorated with lights. I love watching her experience new things and seeing her reactions. Watching her learn has got to be the most rewarding, satisfying, and exciting thing ever. She's a smart cookie.

In other news, I quit one of my teaching jobs. On one hand, I feel bad because I was only there for one semester and I would have liked to show more of a commitment to the staff and students. But on the other hand, I really couldn't handle it. When I was hired, I wasn't given any warning about what I might encounter or how I should handle certain students and situations. And I'm talking about situations that wouldn't happen in your typical elementary classroom. I wasn't told that a lot (read: most) of the students had social issues, medical issues, or serious problems at home. In a city's school district, you can go to the office and read a child's file which would tell you about any past and current issues. Not that some issues define a child, but it's good to know what you're dealing with. It's good to know if you should be more sensitive in regards to a particular students needs, etc. At the school I was just teaching at, there were no files, there was no heads up, there was nothing. I was just surprised when students did or said things that I had no idea could or would ever happen. I was just supposed to deal with whatever came my way. There was little to no support from the head of the school or from the other teachers. It was like, every man for himself. As a first- year teacher, I need all of the support and help I can get. I'm sort of proud of myself for making that declaration because a lot of the time I just try to do everything myself. But this is my CAREER we're talking about here. I want to do it right, the right way, and if asking for help is how I can get it right, then by golly, I will ask. But there was no one to ask at the this school, there was no one that would sit down with you and work out any issues. Does that sound baby-ish to you? To me, it sort of sounds like I'm asking someone to hold my hand and walking with me step by step. But, hey, you try to be a teacher, and then we'll talk.

"Only the brave should teach."

I never thought that teeth would cause so much anxiety in my life. Yes, I said teeth. My daughters teeth. It just never occurs to someone that those little pearly whites can just shatter your days and your very existence. Why won't those teeth just cut already?! I'm so tired of her not eating and seriously, I can't handle much more of this going to bed at 10pm and waking up at 5am business. It's just so exhausting. And, it's funny, because before I was a mother, going to bed later than 10 and waking up at 5am was no problem. Hell, I did it in college all the time! Stay up late to write papers, and then wake up early for an 8am class. Five days a week I did that. And I was good to go! But caring for another human being is just so exhausting. I don't know how the mothers of multiples do it. I could not do it. I mean, I guess I would do it if I had to, ya know, because they're my children. But right now, I can barely get past 8pm without wanting to burry my face in my pillow and cry. Wahh wahhh wahhhhh.

Really, it's not that bad. But it is very tiring.

Happy Holidays everyone! I have been listening to my Charlie Brown Christmas music (and also I've had my Lady Gaga cd on repeat....because I'm just so stinkin funky.)